Sunday 28 June 2020

21 travis strikes again: no more heroes - hanging out at the bbq restaurant with the extremely rude akari

Dear Readers,

I went to the **BBQ Restaurant** with Akari, Kamui and Jeane. It looked a lot like the Nightmare Burger diner.

Akari said she understood we were looking for the Death Balls and we couldn't get to one without going through her.

Kamui asked her if she knew where the balls were. She said she did.

I said good girl. Another nice short answer. I said she knew her stuff and asked her where were they?

She said she was holding onto one for a dear friend. She asked if I thought she was just gonna trust me and hand it off? That she wasn't gonna be like "Go eff yourself" and kill me, right? Kamui said most people would be surprised indeed.

She said she'd killed all over the underworld and was ready to go anytime, anywhere.

She continued with the insults, calling me an otaku d-head with Gordon Gekko hair, and calling Kamui an annoying-ass Japanese dude with creepy eyes. She asked if she was supposed to trust the likes of us? She then called Jeane fugly as sin.

Jeane told me to hurry up and snuff this b!7cH!

Akari was then like what the heck when she heard Jeane talking. She asked what the eff kinda creepy anime crap was this?

I asked Akari if she kissed her mother with that mouth? I asked her if she really wanted to die that badly? Jeane said she'd kill Akari herself!

Kamui then told us all to calm down. He then told Akari that she'd do best to avoid dissing Jeane as she was the wet dream of catlovers everywhere: A talking cat.

Akari told him to eff off, calling him eyeball. She then told me to bring it on, or could I only fight with my title on the line?

I told her there was no price on her little head, but if she were to continue talking crap I would do her for free.

Kamui once again told us all to calm down. He asked Akari to tell us what she wanted.

Akari was like whatever, and that there wasn't enough time nor budget to make a new boss fight for this game. She got that now.

I told her she was pretty observant, calling her sweetheart. Jeane said "Budget" her butt, before saying to just tweak the specs and kill her butt! Kamui told her to shut up. He then said to please just let him negotiate. I told her to keep quiet and she swore out loud.

Akari said she couldn't ignore this cat, but she had one condition. She said if I could solve this crossword puzzle, she'd hand over the ball. Kamui said simple and Jeane and I just responded with ellipses.

In a moment, Kamui said done and Akari yelled CORRECT! She then said as promised, I could have my ball. She handed me something and a picture of keys showed up.

I said this was totally not a ball. Jeane said not to hesitate in carving the b!7ch up! Kamui asked what this was supposed to mean?

Akari said this was an adventure, life was an adventure, "The time for space travel is now!" and every secret had a key. She then said an adventure needed a key, too, right? and that she had even made it a bit easier on me. Kamui asked her what the key was for.

She said she got it from her ex-roommate, Dr. Juvenile. I was like Juvenile, huh? So that was the gimmick. Kamui then said let's go.

I said go where, as we didn't even know what this key... and he said he knew and that he told me he was good at solving mysteries.

After this it was on to the next area. Car Wash Akari turned out to be extremely rude and I'm glad to be leaving her as a solved adventure game NPC. Jeane had some good ideas there. I'm also glad to have Kamui along to help solve this adventure game segment.

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