321 night in the woods - feeling sad, but hanging with dad, so it's not so bad

Dear Readers,

When I got back home from Bea's place after our fight, I had some doodles to make in my journal.

I doodled and wrote. I wrote "HAM*PANTHER", "DINNER!" and drew a little dad's face with "DAD!" underneath. I doodled a plate with a fork and spoon. I doodled a vinyl record with musical notes. I drew Bea looking cross and yelling. I doodled a sad face underneath with the words "FIGHT?" I wrote out some thoughts below. I wrote:

"-HOW DID I MESS THAT UP?"
"-I WANTED TO HELP"
"-I AM"

and underneath that I wrote "GARBAGE" in huge letters. Aw :(

Underneath that I drew Bea's dad and a football and wrote him saying the word "FOOTBALL"

I added some stuff to Dad's main doodle from earlier in my journal as well. I drew a deli cap on him along with some sausage links, a drumstick, a fish and some other "MEATS", which I also wrote underneath.

Speaking of dad, I had a chat with him. He went oof, saying he had a long day and I said I did too. He asked how socialising was and I said it was surprisingly tiring sometimes. He said that's why he didn't do much of it himself!

He said it was a pleasant surprise, seeing me at work tonight! I was like yeah! and couldn't believe I hadn't visited yet. He said I hadn't been back long and I wasn't usually lurking at the Ham Panther. I said who was to say I wasn't? and he said it was nice seeing me anyway. I said lurk lurk :)

I asked him if he had any idea what was up with mom today and we talked about being grown up and stressed, vaguely stressed and specifically stressed. He then said to cheer up kiddo as it was only life. I said gee thanks pop!

I asked about the crawlspace boxes again and he said he'd move 'em. He invited me for more TV time and I said "Yeah for a little bit."

Tonight Garbo and Malloy were talking about the angry drunk crowds of their early days compared to now and cliffhangered on going to counselling.

I went upstairs and got online. I messaged Bea, asking if she was there. After a pause she said yeah. I said I didn't know how I screwed that up so badly and I was sorry. She said it was ok and then said goodnight. I do feel a bit better now that we chatted... Hoping to touch base with her tomorrow for reals too.

I messaged Gregg, who was feeling a bit down. I said it must be something going round and that I got into a fight with Bea and felt like a butthole. We said we could be like the butthole twins, having matching shirts and stuff. Haha :) we said goodnight then. I felt much better now.

I guess this was when he was feeling sad that time. Poor Gregg...

After this, I went to bed and had another of the dreams.